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Life Happens for You

What if the only thing holding you back in life is the story you tell yourself about how life works?

Human beings seem to be natural story tellers. Evidence suggests that we’ve been telling ourselves stories from the beginning of time. Certainly, some of those stories are true. However, some of the stories we tell ourselves are undoubtedly just a matter of belief. They are quite often opinions that don’t square with reality. Yet they are stories that help us understand the world and our place in it. At the deepest level, they contain the essence of what we believe about life.

Here’s an example: Do you believe that life happens “to you” or “for you?”

Isn’t that an interesting distinction? What do you believe?

In my experience coaching people, I often hear “stories” from my clients that suggest that life is happening to them, that life is beyond their control. Perhaps, on some level, that’s true. But is that a good belief to hold? Is that belief good for you, good for others, and does it serve the greater good?

When I suggest that perhaps life is not happening “to them” but “for them,” it often creates an “ah ha” moment. In the East, the word “Satori” means instant awakening, comprehension, or understanding. In these moments, life looks different somehow. The problems we face may be the same. The conditions may be unchanged but yet our viewpoint and ultimate experience transforms.  When our “story” changes, our life changes on some level.

Think about some problem you are currently facing and then decide if that problem is happening “to you” or “for you?”

I choose to believe that “Life happens for me.” The difference is just one word. Think about that. Is life happening “to” you or “for” you? I don’t always remember this belief when problems seem to be hitting me from all sides but, when I do, I have a moment of Satori.